Back in the USA

It has been a few weeks since I have been in Israel. My heart broke a little bit as the plane took off, but I knew that it was time for new things in my life. Now as the news is flooded with terrible sights and my mind keeps running through a million different thoughts, I hope that I am right about leaving.

For now I am residing in Alaska with my family and will soon make the move to Oregon. Being home has been wonderful and it is great to get back to some of my old hobbies. This year has been one that I will reflect upon for the rest of my life. The things I have done and seen have connected me to Israel in a way I never thought possible and for this I am so thankful for. I know will return sometime, I’m just not sure when.

Adventures in Hobbit Land

Cappadocia is a weird place. We hadn’t realized how big Turkey was when we made our plane reservations for five days, which isn’t enough time. So at the youth hostel in the beginning we picked one place to go to and for time efficiency signed up for a tour. It’s nice that they took care of everything for us, but this was still one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
Continued...

First a word on Cappadocia. Do to some volcanic activity; the land is covered with cone like rock structure with wide angled black tops. Other than being a geological phenomenon, it has capitalized on as a tourist attraction and the whole town is obsessed with making things look like the cones. Clock towers had angled tops on them. Tourist knickknacks of cartoon versions of these cones were for sale every 2 meters. There were cartoon drawings of them. All of this was a little silly.

Now after the bus ride from hell, we were dropped at our hotel at 9:30. The night of crying coughing babies did not allow for much sleep and I am now face to face with very small women yelling at me to get on the tour bus b/c we are late.
“um.. I think we were supposed to be provided breakfast” – I stammered to her
“NO. NO TIME FOR EAT! Please, tour now.” – small Turkish tour guide.

This was probably the most audible thing we heard that day. This women must have memorized a simple script of English for the tour b/c it was very very basic and questions were either not answered, or answered with something completely irrelevant to what was asked. Example –
“Over here is a cone cave. No one lives there now.” – little tour guide
“So, what people used to live there?” – me
“I was born in Istanbul, thank you.” – little tour guide

“How much longer do you think the tour will be?” – me
“I studied for 4 years to be a tour guide. It’s very selective here.” – little tour guide

We began the day with a 2 hour hike.
“Get out your water bottles, you’ll be thirsty.” – little tour guide
“We didn’t have time to get water!” – me
“That’s right, it’s important to drink water, you could get very sick with out it.” – little tour guide

I wish I could describe more on how these cones were formed and what their purpose served to the people of Turkey, but this information was way too hard to get out of our guide. We were left to enjoy the land in a superficial visual manner instead. We climbed through caves and across the land. The whole place from what we saw was really contrived. This was one of the first times I had participated in a set up “authentic” experience and I will surely be careful of my touring in the future because of this experience.

Anyways some good came of it all when we saw where we were sleeping. All of the hotels in Cappadocia are set up in the theme of the caves and we got to sleep in a cave room. Okay okay, it wasn’t a real cave, but still how often do you get to sleep in something that looks like a cave?

We stayed there for two days and on the last day we had the afternoon for pool sitting. The thought of sitting by the pool had kept Shosh and I moving when we were dog tired and it had finally arrived when – bam! The biggest downpour of rain we’d seen in a while started to drench everything in sight. We took shelter in the main cave room (hotel restaurant). Some old men were playing sheshbesh (backgammon) and it’s a good thing I learned some mad sheshbesh playing skills in Israel because otherwise we would have had nothing to do for four hours. We played for a few hours and then it was back on the overnight bus again. Not fun.

Back in Istanbul we spent the day walking around the city and hung out until our plane was leaving. The whole trip was great; it was just not enough time to really see Turkey. There is so much to this country; I will have to come back some other time.

The Bus Ride From Hell

Getting from Istanbul to Cappadocia, our next travel destination could possibly have been done in less than an hour flight for the more lucrative traveler. For Shosh and I, the 12-hour overnight bus would have to do.

This bus was your standard Grayhound/Egged transport. But, for Turkey, this was first class comfort. To assert this fact, we were treated to the bus equivalent of a stewardess giving out bottled water, coffee and tea, fresh coca cola, moist towelettes, little chocolate cakes and some weird antibiotic rub (I think).. actually this very well could have been Pine-sol. When they got me thinking the caviar was right around the corner, the trouble begin to start.
Continued ...

First of all I really had to pee. The combination of funneling all these free beverages down our throats and travel nerves was creating a desperate problem. The first stop we make I jump up and am out the door. That’s when I run smack into the cigarette cloud of our driver. There was lots of yelling, but I got the impression that I was not allowed to use the bathroom now. Not enough time. Then we waited there for 45 minutes. During this time span our bus was infiltrated with people in the aisles selling candy, sandwiches, bread, and seriously – pillows. I wrote off buying a pillow because they were 101 Dalmatian pillows and damn if I’ll be caught dead sleeping on that.

About two hours down the road the pee break was granted. Shosh and I dash off, and to our surprise, get experience toilets outside of touristville. At first I though I may have entered the men’s room. But viewing the long-standing line of women in layers and layer of flowing clothing squelched that theory. Nope, this was a small porcelain hole that I got to pee in. I do a quick mental review of all the amazing times I was privileged enough to relieve myself in the quite natural woods and outdoors and sigh, and squat. The smell of ammonia was nauseating, but not as bad as the excrement that really can’t be flushed if one is using a small hole. I make a mental note after this that I am not drinking anything ever again.

Back on the bus it was movie time. The DVD was inserted and became clear that this was bought of the street, probably at the first stop with the Dalmatian pillows. But the cast and plot looked good - some jail break movie with Nicolas Cage and John Cusack. And we were about to get all excited when.. it was in Turkish. Of course. Then the babies started crying. For hours. And coughing. They never stopped coughing for the next 9 hours. I think I have tuberculosis now.

Not synagogue, fish restaurant

Day one in Turkey was a serious adventure. Istanbul is our playground for the next two days. Shoshi and I spent the morning viewing the main tourist sites of the land. Two big, I mean big, mosques. One called Aya Sophia was getting renovated and we counted 26 floors of scaffolding in the middle of it. Kinda made us dizzy. There was also this lucky hole in one of the pillars where if one places their finger inside and it comes out moist, you are supposed to be granted good luck. Oddly enough putting fingers in moist holes was a common theme among the sites here.



The other mosque was more exciting at night because it was all lit up and for some reason birds just circled and circled around it, illuminated by the lights. This is what we say when we first arrived. Pretty.
Continued...

Next we went to an underground cistern. This place was a personal injury lawyer's wet dream. Getting in and out required a death-defying trip down the slipperiest wettest stairs I have ever been on. The walk way on the bottom was also way too smooth and slippery. People working there were squeegying away, but obviously had none of the skills as an Israeli would. They just pushed the water with one motion and moved it around. Also down here was another good luck moist hole.

Our stomachs were grumbling after this so we took to the streets for lunch. Not quite as bad as Jordan, but the people selling things do some harassing. This was no different with the restaurant owners, each trying to "help us find our way" (I'm sure we were looking super lost all the time) but really trying to get us to eat at their place. Annoying. We dashed into a little stand in an alley way where we found this shwarmah like dish wrapped in lafah like bread. The Turkish burrito! We were saved! And it turned out to be half the price as those other places and we got two.

A museum and a half later we were sightseeinged out and thought it would be a good time to try and locate the Istanbul synagogue. This is where our adventure truly began. Seriously only two blocks out of touristville things started to look very very different. In the area of our hostel and surrounding streets things looked cute. The streets were cobblestones, the people more genuinely friendly, men and women walking everywhere, wearing whatever. And everyone spoke English.

Now, two blocks away this all changes. We reached the edge of a huge river and saw quite a sight. Anywhere a person would fit on the side of the water they were fishing. People were bustling all over. Ships where coming and going dropping and picking up hundreds and hundreds of commuters.


Street food in the country has been just awesome. I am loving the variety and lack of falafel. We've had salted sliced cucumbers, fresh corn, that shwarmah burrito. I've seen mangos and coconuts, and also muscles, but in the hot sun, we stayed away from those.

Here at the waters edge was no exception. They were selling these fish sandwiches that smelled amazing. Too bad we had just eaten. But just seeing the scene was something else. Men frying these fish were in the middle of a mass of people, wearing red fez hats, everyone screaming, selling, and buying something. I really wanted a picture of all this, so I got out my camera and I was trying all these angles to really capture the scene, really really looking like a tourist. Then I felt something behind me. First I thought it was someone trying to cut open my bag so I reached for that, but instead I felt this fat pinch on my ass! EwWWWW!! I kinda freaked out because there were people everywhere and I had no idea who did it.

I started walking to get out fast and it happened again! This time I saw the guy and smacked him hard on the back. Maybe not the smartest thing because then he starts to circle back and follow us. We wanted to get rid of him and so we flipped him off at the same time. Also not so successful because he took his middle finger and licked it!!! Probably one of the most revolting things I've ever seen. Then he kept following us. We started to cross a long bridge and he was still on our tail!

Really, we had no idea what to do and it was getting really scary. I kept hoping a police officer would show up. I've never wanted to see a cop so bad in my life.

Thankfully that's just what happened. Right on the bridge we saw some sort of street cop and ran to him. We explained everything in complete detail. Then realized the cop spoke no English. No matter, because once the ass grabber saw him, he took off in the other direction.

Across the bridge was really a completely different environment. No English spoken anywhere, few women, and nobody knew where a synagogue might be. We had a general idea of the area and wandered in that direction. Things were looking deserted. We asked a cab driver in sign language to take us there. He was trying to hard to be helpful, but ended up just bringing us to a hotel where they spoke English. They didn't speak English at the hotel. That was a productive use of our Lira!

Meandering along we stumbled upon this shopping area. It turned out to be the trendy, popular walking/ hanging out area of the locales. After a refueling with ice cream we continued.

When we were once again sure we were headed in the right direction, we turned a corner and found ourselves again on a deserted street. Thinking we were still in the correct direction we pressed on. Some guys found us and started talking to us in Turkish. This was followed by chasing behind us down the road. Ahhhh. This place could be so freaky. We lost them a street down and asked directions. Luck of all luck we had asked a fluent English speaker who ended up walking us there. Some of the people in the country are so wonderful and some so creepy.

We get to the synagogue and it was the weirdest thing. The man walking us kept saying it was closed, but we thought he just meant it was closed for the day. Not the case. Actually there was a wedding going on, but for the last two years the whole thing had been shut down because it was bombed twice. For the wedding there was special permission with special security. Two cars blocked off both ends of the street and there was a man on watch outside.

Of course thinking I'm still in Israel, I figure we could just talk him into letting us take a peek inside, maybe even get an invite to the wedding, being such exotic world travelers and all. Well the security guard was not having it. We talked and talked and he pretty much threatened to arrest us when someone from the synagogue came out to talk to us. He said the only way we were getting in was if the head rabbi gave us special permission and that would take a week or so. Imagine being so fearful of terrorism that your entire synagogue was shut down and couldn't be entered with out massive security and top permission. It was really sad.

The man then told us of another synagogue and we were off on the search once again.

Of course again we ended up hopelessly lost on a man street with no English speakers. Attempts at more directions were futile and I was beginning to wonder how safe it was to be announcing to every Muslim on the street that we were Jewish.

We stopped in a fish restaurant and asked where the synagogue might be and the guy goes - "Not synagogue, fish restaurant, fish restaurant here!" - the language barrier is getting annoying.

We backtracked for a bit, found a nice cafe, which sometimes means English and - tada - we got really good directions... and information that it was closed until 9am the next day!




Ten minutes later we found ourselves locked outside a small building, recognizable only by a tiny little Jewish star on the top. Well at least we had ourselves an adventure.

Survival of Jordan

My travels have taken me first to jordan. the country was very... arab. as they say, not bad, just different - but this was really really different.

we crossed the border in the afternoon. after you leave israel there's a 5 minute walk btw the countries, sort of a void/no mans land. then we reach the border. after paying fees and getting all stamped up we were on jordanian soil. the 4 of us cram into a cab and are whisked to petra, which is about an hour and a half down the road. due to stops for more cigarettes for the driver and at look out points with conveniently placed bedouins selling shit it was late when we arrived.
Continued...



shosh's parents bought her and her brother a nice hotel room for a present and we thought we might be able to squeeze all 4 of us in one room. well we though this would be possible. the jordanian hotel manager thought otherwise.
"ONLY 2 per room. NO one else!" he yelled a bit and so the other guy and i made a quick choice to split the cost of another room just for the night. a dirty hostel could wait for another night b/c we were really tired and hungry. and i'm try not to land in some jordanian prison cell during the trip.

getting downtown was another interesting experience. at first walking seemed like a good idea, but we soon realized we weren't exactly sure where to go and it was really dark. and then we heard gun shots. time for a cab.

at a kiosk near by we asked for them to call us a cab.
"my friends, my friends, right this way, here is cab"

this was not a cab. it was a big dirty van. he quotes us a fairly cheap ride to town so we get in. most of the space inside is occupied with chichy things like chili pepper lights and other hanging plastic junk. the dash board is covered in faux fur.

town was another world. big signs with things like there is no other god but allah. mohammah is the messager. these were the billboards. our "cab" brought us to a "really good authentic arab restaurant." it looked like the most expensive place in town and owned by a relative of the driver. we quickly split.

we dinned a bit down the street. the place was chosen more by the persuasion of the owner rather than our noses, but its getting harder and harder to say no to all the begging to buy. we ate outside and i spent some time people watching. something was off. it occurred to me there wasn't a single women in town. not even burka'ed. none. that was weird. after we went walking around and stopped to catch the score of the world cup. as those who know, i'm a little world cupped out right now and i started looking around. it was then i noticed this man like 3 feet/a meter away from me, staring, just openly staring at my boobs. ewww! seriously creepy. i just quickly walked away and my friends followed.

petra was our all day activity. we first needed to locate a cab outside the hotel. and what pulls up for our transportation? the very same shaggin' waggon from last night! everyone is trying to make a buck or dinar rather in this country.

this couldn't be true than with the bedouins. inside the ruins of petra you can pretty much go anywhere. we climbed like a million stairs for an hour to this really amazing look out, where we could also look out w/ fresh bedouin tea, cold coke, and water, plus an unbelievable amount of crap to buy.

also another way we could have spent our cash was donkey rides. everywhere. small bedouin children going-
"want a donkey? want a ride?"
variations on this were coming up to us w/ a donkey and going -
"taxi, taxi" or "Ferrari, Ferrari"
cute maybe the first 6 times, but when that number started to reach the 100s and my hydration level was dropping steadily, i contemplated how far i could throw a small bedouin child.

that night i trekked across the street to find a cheaper bed. there was a conveniently a small hostel across the street and i checked in. like 8 dollars a night verse the 60 bucks i split the night before. and it wasn't so bad. okay it was pretty dirty. my room was a double bed w/ hardly any room to walk around it. when i pulled the sheets back i saw bare nasty mattress. and when i took a shower down the hall a bit of sewage bubbled up. ewww!

the good thing was that the hostel had a mini bus that drove to the town by the border. shosh and her bro were staying another night, but i was petra/jordaned out and missed israel

but a cab by myself was too expensive. i remembered the guide book saying there were two types of buses, the bus company that was really nice and comfortable and one that was cheap. it also said not to take the cheap one, which was what all the locales took. i was so relieved about the hostel having a bus b/c i wouldn't have to deal with finding any of the buses.

at 6am when the manager told me the bus would arrive i was patiently waiting in the lobby. i asked the guy and he said he called the driver, but he didn't answer. i wait. 6:30. no bus. he tells me he'll call again. no answer. then he goes - "I prefer you take a cab to the bus station"

i do a mini freak out. bus station? what bus station? i explain i want to take the nicer, not local bus and where can i find that... but the man doesn't understand. really most people in town know a few things in english really really well so it seems like they speak perfectly, but really they have no idea.

so i can't get the info on the nice buses and i realize i'm going to travel on the exact public bus the guide book said not to take.

i go outside to look for a taxi. nothing comes. i wait and wait. after some time a truck drives by
"my friend, where you want to go? i take you"
my mind starts reeling. should i go? is this safe? this is some random guy. this is arab land. a women by her self isn't safe. what if another cab never comes? how long could i be waiting here?

all this mental calculating ended with me getting into the truck. i immediately regretted this decision when he began to tell me how the tourists never stay in petra long enough and all these things i missed and how it would be no problem for him to be my personal guide.
"i take you now, no problem"
and i go - "no, the bus station please"
"we go now, how much time you have?"
i tell him something about meeting people in an hour in eilat
"okay only an hour. we go now"
i cry NO like 5 times and these weren't the polite no thanks. these were like NO, BUS STATION NOW" a little scary. i probably shouldn't have done that.

at the bus station the driver grabs my bag and directs me to the bus. he throws 2 guys out of the front seat and puts me there with my bag. looking around i saw i was seriously on public transportation. 11 women in full on burkas. lots of old arab men. children everywhere. a goat.

i definitely looked a little out of place. near the end of the ride we had to stop at a check point. of sorts. people got our their IDs and a few soldiers came and looked around. then one of them pulled a guy right of the bus and we drive away. weird...

at some stop further down we picked up a guy that sat next to me and spoke english. after asking about how i liked petra he goes-
"where are you going my friend? I drive taxi"
of course he does. i ask how much and he quotes me 5, i say 4.
"for you? 4... but really the price is 5"

we finally arrive in aqaba. i get out and immediately another driver asks if i want to go to the border. then he goes 2 dinar. so i tell my i'm going with the new guy. my guy goes-
"2 dinar? okay 1 dinar"
they start getting in a bidding war over me! and seriously fighting and yelling at each other in the street. my driver is also screaming at me
"GET in the car, NOW! put your bag in the car!"
i double check that he's still planning on 1 dinar and get in. i successfully arrive at the border. all in one piece. all limbs working and i've evaded jordanian prison cells. YES!

just so happened i was 1 dinar short of the exit tax, so i had to exchange some shekels to leave. you'd better believe i was kissing the dirt when i stepped back on to the holy land soil.

My year in Israel is coming to a close, and I have been doing some travel outside the country. The next few blogs will be devoted to these adventures around the Middle East. Enjoy!